Well three days ago I came forth about my addiction. Growing up in the country, my family dipped, this included both the males and the females, young and old. It was snuff for most of the women, Copenhagen for the men and etc. My family knew the tobacco brand all to well and I was no exception. My first taste was called Honest snuff, it came in a tin can and you put it in your lip. I think I have tried it all Honest, Garrett, and Sweet snuff; Red Man, Days Work, Cannon Ball, Beechnut, Copenhagen, Grizzly, husky, Levi, Longhorn, Red Seal, Skoal, Timber Wolf, and etc. That’s a lot of brands but they come n different forms and different taste levels and I think I have tried them all.
You see this has been my addiction since before the law said I had to be 18 to buy. I remember I could walk right into the neighborhood store and buy this as a child for anyone of my family members and it was nothing wrong with it. I didn’t get in trouble for it because back then no one really knew the risks of it and it wasn’t causing significant issues or had mind altering side effects. Then in 1997 when the law was passed that you had to be 18 to buy, I was still able to get it because people knew my family and they knew they all used it so no one ever stopped me from being able to obtain tobacco.
It became a habit and no matter how much I tried to stop, I always went back to using it. I would say about 26yrs I have used tobacco off and on. I have never stopped cold turkey because I wanted to. Well after writing my post three days ago and praying about the habit. I gave it over to God and today I am proud to say I have fought the urge for three days now. Yes, there is some in the house, I have other dippers in the house but I have been able to go without. God has given me the strength to fight the urge to have it. I mostly would crave it after eating something, when I awake in the morning and before bed at night. Well all glory to God I only wanted it once but God got me through.
I know I still have a ways to go because when family go out this is something they will definitely get the other because we all know it is one thing we all have in common. The taste for it is not as strong as it normally is and I am able to see it and not fulfill the temptation inside of me. I am only telling you this part because God is helping me get over an addiction I have had since childhood.
He has also told me to let go of my job which I have been holding on to out of fear. It’s like a hundred-dollar bill in our hand. If we hold on to tight God can never give us more so we must be willing to let it go in order to receive the blessing the Lord has for us. So Monday will be my last day! I can’t believe I just said that but despite all I am going through I am learning that everything has a reason and the Lord will never lead me astray.
I am still dealing with this storm over my head but nothing has defeated me. I am still a child of God’s and he is still making a way for me. I know some may think I share too much but I am freeing myself from anything that could damper the progress I am making in the relationship I seek with God. I am in great spirits and laughter is often despite my dark circumstances. I know God is making a way for me and I will come out victorious.
People, I tell you God is such an amazing Father, there’s nothing he can’t help us overcome if we just have faith in him. I can tell y’all I was on the verge of giving up but God said here I am, come unto me and I will lighten your load. The lord took away the very thing that was getting my attention. The very thing that I felt an urge to keep buying. The thing that I felt I needed and couldn’t seem to go without but God said I will remove this hindrance from your life if you’re ready and ask me to. The Lord did it and he can do for you!
I’ve tried on my own several times but this time the Lord has taken this temptation from me. This is not the first time he has given me the fight to defeat temptation because when I decided to go into celibacy I really needed the Lord and he came through for me. I can’t even begin to understand why he loves me so but I am thankful he does. I am thankful that he is so forgiven and willing to go through this life with us.
I know that this is only the beginning because God is bringing us out and he is delivering us from addictions and anything else that may be driving a wedge between our relationship with him. The Lord has declared that this is our season and that things in our lives is turning around. Nothing will stop us from being victorious because we serve an awesome God. Everything that was sent to destroy us is only making us stronger and God will use it to make us prospers in this world. He’s doing it in our favor, there’s a blessing with our names on it and God has said it’s so. All we have to do is trust in him, have faith in him, call on him and talk to him because he’s ready, willing and able but he is waiting on you to ask him into your life. God is there when man is not. He loves you and he wants to help but how can he if we never acknowledge that we have a problem or that we need his help. God can’t enter where we have shut him out. Somebody should be shouting amen!
My brothers and sisters in Christ I am here to tell you that God is delivering us, we are walking in favor, this is our season. Our abundance in love, finance, family and etc. is coming. Look to the hills because God is waiting and from him comes our help.
I love you but Christ loves you more!